In 1978 “The Gambler”, by singer Kenny Rogers, was a number 1 country hit, and achieved mainstream success on the pop charts at a time when country songs rarely crossed over. At first glance the lyrics aren’t particularly appealing nor seem meaningful. However, a closer look at references to the game of poker and how they pertain to life, provide some guiding principles regarding the choices and decisions we make, and how to play the hand you are dealt. The chorus goes like this. “You’ve got to know when to hold’em, know when to fold’em, know when to walk away, and know when to run. You never count your money when you’re sittin’ at the table, there’ll be time enough for countin’ when the dealin’s done.”

Over the past month I have had more life challenges and difficult circumstances than at any time in the past 30 years. Everywhere I turned, I felt like I was ready to fold’em, walk away, cut my loses, and start fresh. It was an incredibly stressful time that seemed to culminate in a perfect storm blowing through my life both personally and professionally. The timing of the storm threw off many of the normal patterns and practices that I am usually very vigilant to maintain. For anyone who has followed my journey toward rest and life balance you know I’ve made major changes in my life over the past five years, adopting healthy habits, setting and enforcing boundaries, and engaging in lifestyle practices that really work.

However, during this storm, before I knew it, as mental and physical fatigue set in, I allowed emotions to take the “driver’s seat” resulting in some very unwanted reactions and outcomes. Ironically, I’d recently written a post entitled “Are you a thermostat or thermometer?” A thermostat controls an environment, whereas a thermometer reacts to it. I was clearly acting like a thermometer reacting to the situation rather than a thermostat responding to what was going on.

In one line of the song the gambler says, “If you’re gonna play the game, boy, you gotta learn to play it right.”  As I reflect on the past several weeks, I’ve have learned valuable lessons that I hope not to repeat anytime soon.

1.If I expect to experience and maintain rest and life balance, I must be extremely watchful and vigilant that when things seem to spiral out of control, that my first action step is to go before the Lord in prayer, spend time in His presence, go to His Word, and reset spiritually to gain a fresh perspective.

2.Determine and commit to never make important life decisions when I’m feeling physically exhausted or mentally spent.

3.Never make decisions when I am emotionally “triggered”, especially if that emotion is frustration or anger. James 1: 19-20 says, “This you know, my beloved brethren. But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God.” Never let emotions “drive the train.”

4.Go to those advisors, mentors, and friends, whom you trust to provide counsel and support that line up with your values and purposes.

There’s a line in the second verse of “The Gambler” that goes like this. “Every gambler knows that the secret to survivin’ is knowin’ what to throw away and knowin’ what to keep.” Each poker hand dealt has the potential to be a winning or losing hand depending on what you decide to throw away and what you decide to keep. And so is the hand we play in life.

If I were to rewrite that line, it would say “Everyone who is seeking life-balance knows that the secret to thrivin’ is knowin’ what to throw away and knowin’ what to keep.

Don’t gamble with your well-being!

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