Last week I posted on the topic of trust. Today I want to focus on an aspect of trust that is essential for building and keeping it – safety. The word safe may not come to mind or rise to the top of your list when you define or describe trust, however, it is a key component. In my previous post I referred to a line from the Disney movie Aladdin when Aladdin invites Princess Jasmine to go for a ride on his magic carpet. The princess touches the fringe of the carpet and asks is it safe?

If you really think about it, whether it’s getting on “a magic carpet” such as boarding an airplane, taking medicine our physician has prescribed, crossing a rope bridge over a ravine, driving through an intersection when your light turns green, or entrusting our investments to a financial advisor; consciously or sub consciously we are asking is it safe?  Our answer to the question “Is it safe?”  is a strong prerequisite and indicator of our ability or willingness to trust in hundreds of areas of life.

I believe the most critical area where Is it safe? and do I trust? comes into play, is around relationships. And the question transitions from “Is it safe?” to “Are you safe?”

The first relationship we ask, “Are you safe?” is with God. The answer is a resounding Yes! It involves trust, belief, and faith in the Word of God, who He says He is, and what He has done. His attributes and character demonstrate over and over that He is 100% worthy of our trust. He is safe! He is our refuge, and our strong tower. God is worthy of our trust and with that trust comes true rest and peace.

The second area we ask, are you safe? is in our earthly relationships. In our vertical relationship with God, He is trustworthy. Unfortunately, in our horizontal relationships with our fellow earthlings, trust is often broken, and relationships are ruined, robbing us of rest, peace, fellowship, and joy.

Certainly, at the core of restoring broken trust is repentance and reaching out regardless of if someone broke trust with you causing pain, or if you are the one who caused the breach, be willing to take the first step. Realize it might take some time. After repentance, the first step is to create a safe environment, a must for trust to be restored.

Consider the following when building a safe space or becoming a safe person: 1) Tell the truth in love. 2) Establish and maintain confidentiality (break confidence just once and you are guaranteed to fail.) 3) Where you have caused pain, and broken trust, intentional or not, own it. Don’t make excuses, – Never start with “If” I have hurt you? You have! 4) Talk to not about the person. If trust was broken in the first place because you talked about the person behind their back, and gossiped, make it right. Not only confess it to them but to anyone you spoke to, with the offended person present. And 5) Make restitution as needed and appropriate.

If we are going to fulfil the greatest commandment of all,  to love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength, AND to love others as yourself, then we must commit to repentance and restoration of our earthly relationships where trust has been breached or broken. The Scriptures tell us “Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy, without holiness no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. – Hebrews 12:14-15. If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all – Romans 12:18. Restoring broken trust is not easy and may even cause a bit of friction, sort of like a base runner sliding into home plate. May the Heavenly Umpire when the dust settles declare you – Safe!

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